Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Week 28

I'm two day late this week and contemplated not posting anything at all.  I don't have anything to say and when I looked through my camera file of the week's photos, this is what I found. 
Yea.  I was pretty excited to have scored these 4 bright collegiate ruled composition books for fifty cents each at Target. 

I didn't have any photos of the bear and cubs my dog and I spooked out of the yummy black cap raspberries while we were out on a walk.  Nor of the beautiful golden sunsets we've been having.  I didn't see any of the horses or cows with their slick, shiny coats, or of the swimming hole reflecting the sun like a bejeweled pair of blue jeans. I didn't even have any photos of the yummy food we've been eating from the garden.  We got home from Vegas and found tomatoes, cucumbers, lots of squash and we even still have peas and lettuce.  But no photos.   Just a photo of my new stack of journals.

I journal in the morning.  It is my vent session, self talk, prayer and general to-do list.  I call it my rudder.  I use it to keep me pointed in the direction I think I want to go.  It helps me notice things about myself that I like and things that I might want to change.  It has help me overcome some bad habits.  At the end of the year I burn the journals and start over.  I don't really want my ancestors to read them.  They aren't good and are only a tiny representation of my life and might give someone the wrong idea about things or people.   Like I said,  I vent sometimes and write private stuff. 

Sort of like this blog uncensored.

Blogging feels a bit narcissist and vain.  I don't really have anything important to share, yet I keep plugging away because I like looking back over these 'censored' journal entries and seeing all the things that make a life.  This is a place our ancestors can look at and get a feel for us and the ranch.  I write about real stuff, I don't make anything up, but I try to keep my rants here to a minimum.  And trust me, I am a hot blooded, Portuguese woman and I can sometimes be a bit emotional.  I put that stuff in my journals to rid myself of it and put more of the good stuff here.  The stuff I want to remember. 

I've had a few local people walk up to me and say," Hi, I read your blog."  There is an openness and familiarity in their demeanor and conversation.  They know me.  What they don't seem to realize is I don't know them.  At all.  It is a bit awkward sometimes.  It makes me smile.  I only think of two couples when I write out these posts.  They are my commenters.   Dan and Betty in New Mexico and Bill and Juanita in Colorado. We've since become friends in person with Dan and Betty and we hope to get out to Colorado someday and surprise Bill and Juanita at their lodge.  Both couples are an easy audience.  Really nice people.  But of course they aren't the only ones reading.  In reality I'm throwing my thoughts, our life, this place to the whole wide world and I wonder if it is safe or smart?  Sometimes, that is a bit unnerving and I consider stopping.  Do I really want this stuff out THERE?  Do you? 


  1. Thanks for the nice comments. Sometimes word pictures are as effective as picture pictures. It allows me to see what you've seen through your words. I can even put my on mental 'processing' onto the picture. I can understand why it's hard to keep a blog going. I had to quit. May start again some day, who knows? I would miss it, but I would understand. Warmest regards, Dan

    PS: We still have you on our calendar for the 2015 Balloon Fiesta.

  2. Absolutely, thank you for the kind words. I can definitely relate to the lack of picture thing. I haven't blogged yet this week because I don't even have a set of journals to show. We've done a huge amount of stuff this week, but ... I like your idea about journals - especially the burning at the end of the year. Do you sort of turn that into an event of sorts? You should, you know.

    We took the horses to one of RMNP's lakes today. I thought I would spend tomorrow from 5 1/2 hours horseback. Instead it will be from taking a spill on the trail and having to hobble with two bruised knees and a bruised elbow. BTW, not horse related spill; I just can't walk very well on my own apparently! Also, I let the neighbor talk me into working at the Livery tomorrow morning, so that should soften me up quite nicely.
    Enjoy all your yummy garden food!
    Bionic Cowgirl


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